Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Conservative Majority - the Alien Invasion Begins

Foolish humans! We have succeeded with "Operation Landing Bridge" and your conquest is now all but assured.

The two final pieces fall into place:

1. We needed to eliminate our erstwhile ally, Osama Bin Laden. He knew too much and we needed him too little.

2. Then, we needed to secure absolute control of a sizeable swath of land to secretely land the invasion fleet that will conquer Kloopdu 3, or, as you call it, Earth.

With our puppet, Stephen Harper, now fully in charge of Canada, we can prepare the ground for our secret landing.

And you Canadians shall be the first humans to learn of the horrible torture that is life as our slaves. But before that, we'll warm you up with a few years of horrid Conservative government.

Harper will build mega-prisons and you, innocent, foolish Canadians will live in there. We will take away all your rights and freedoms. You will be made to wear uniforms that will seem too thick in summer and too thin in winter. You will eat only potatoes. And in work, you will be highly efficient!

Take heart, Canada, it may hurt that you voted for your own destruction and misery; but trust us, there are worse alien overlords out there than us.


  1. Yep.

    The third rail of government is now firmly in place. And it don't lead to Ottawa.
    At least we have Jack, who can jump over walking sticks and maybe paint a moustache on the harp player...Because it would be fun.


  2. Chucker, Found the secret codicil to the December 1, 2008 pact.